Monday, September 9, 2013

Truth in Waiting

For the last four months I have been contemplating on making life decisions based off of emotions and based off of past experiences. It left me in a state of turmoil. I had no real answers and I saw no real solution. I started to distant myself from my relationships because I felt the need to be alone. I was hiding behind a smile but all the while I wasn't smiling when I was left all alone. I gravitated toward things that desired more of my attention than I could give. And I was left feeling so empty. When you are under spiritual distress the only thing good for you is what you pull away from. Even though I was asking God for the answer and the answer didn't come when I expected it to. It came when I was ready to hear the truth. The answer came while I was waiting for His response. The reason why my go through was as intense as it was, because the underlying reason why I was in this state of being, was because of me. To hear the truth didn't make me run and hide, the truth allowed for me to finally set my heart and mind free. The cause of everything was me. My ears and eyes were congested with what I wanted to see, hear and believe. I didn't ask God to help my disbelief for the fact that my belief in me was disbelieving. It had nothing to do with Him but all to do with me. The truth in waiting was for me to finally see myself in the image that He created. What a loving God we should want to serve. He sees pass our mishaps and finds something special in each of us that made Him say, it is finish. We are all remarkable prospects in the eyes of God full of grandeur and potential that can set this world axis off course. Who you are and what you can do there are no limits. You set the stage and you orchestrate your own performance and the one who's been applauding has been waiting on you all along. 


Duly Noted and Marked

To My Dad:

You are more to me than anyone could ever be. You saw past my inadequacies and gave me hope for a future. You love me when I couldn't stand to see a reflection of me. You gave me what I couldn't give myself. In the time of need you supplied all. For the rest of my days I will long to be with you forever. And when I failed you, you held me in the palm of your hand and you kept me close. Through sickness, heartache, failed relationships, near death experiences you signed my name across your heart. And I am forever indebted to you. How many ways can I tell you how much I love you ....dad..for my life will be a living reminder of how much I do..... 

your daughter